Each year a host of one-liners from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival are voted upon and a Top Ten published. This year there appears to be one token funny woman. That sucks. The chosen few are:
10. My mum's so pessimistic, that if there was an Olympics for pessimism ... she wouldn't fancy her chances. (Nish Kumar)
9. I waited an hour for my starter so I complained: It's not rocket salad. (Lou Sanders)
8. I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting! (Stewart Francis)
7. Pornography is often frowned upon, but that's only because I'm concentrating. (George Ryegold)
6. I took part in the sun tanning Olympics - I just got Bronze. (Tim Vine)
5. I'm good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet ... I don't know why. (Chris Turner)
4. You know you're working class when your TV is bigger than your book case (Rob Beckett)
3. I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister. (Will Marsh)
2. Last night me and my girlfriend watched 3 DVDs back to back. Luckily I was the one facing the telly. (Tim Vine)
1. You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks. (Stewart Francis)
My favourite is defo number 5, but then it's the most subtle :-) . Followed by number 3, for obvious reasons!
btw I presume that the only reason the winning joke works is because so many people know the names of the children. Otherwise, I would offer up Boris Johnson, the Mayor of London. His children are called:
Lara Lettice
Milo Arthur
Cassia Peaches
Theodore Apollo
Next to these names, I think that
Brooklyn Joseph
Romeo James
Cruz David
Harper Seven
look a bit tame, actually!
Showing posts with label david beckham. Show all posts
Showing posts with label david beckham. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Sunday, July 22, 2007
he's heeeeeeeeeeere!
ok, so after perusing the pix available this morning, the one i finally decided best represents the debut of david beckham for the los angeles galaxy team against the scum yesterday is this celebrity shot.
doug (my classmate and yanks fan) invited me over to watch the game. we had the espn coverage on the tv, and the yankees game on his laptop on the coffee table. i wore a lovely qpr t-shirt, and he got his old inter shirt out for the occasion.
so why did i pick this particular photograph? because of the espn coverage of a football match. first of all, there was the "beckham cam", where we were forced to look at his feet and check whether or not they were in his shoes. then there were the 'celebrity' interviews - drew carey, governor schwarzenegger, etc - please tell me (or rather you'd better not) what on earth a pitch-side chat with jennifer love hewitt, 'star' of some tv series, was doing on-screen while the game was actually being played? that's just what every sports fan, every football fan is craving rather than watching abel xavier thwart another drogba attack on goal.
that is the way in the usa. i don't think, however, it is the way to turn people on to football. if they are watching for the cutaway shots of tv and sports stars, then maybe the e-entertainment channel is the place for television coverage of the los angeles galaxy. grumble grumble rant!
Friday, May 18, 2007
scooby dooby who?
i have to admit that i loved scooby doo when i was about 9. wouldn't miss it. here is a recent adidas ad that has grafted a current icon onto the aged one:
as d says, becks is a lot better looking than that!
as d says, becks is a lot better looking than that!
Thursday, July 06, 2006
bye bye beckham
of all the reports, articles and posts i have read regarding the resignation of england football captain david beckham in the wake of england's elimination from the world cup, this is the one i appreciated the most:
"For a footballer to wear a sarong and pink nail varnish took courage
Notebook by Matthew Parris (The Times Online)
IT IS TOO early for the obituaries, but here’s a modest three cheers from a columnist with no interest in football. I have never met David Beckham and don’t expect to, but I admire him. Beyond his footballing, I think he has shown real moral courage as a role model. Anyone who had suggested ten years ago that there would be a natural place in our sporting pantheon for a fellow who wore a sarong, experimented with pink nail varnish and funny hairstyles, sported male jewellery and agreed to an interview with the gay lifestyle magazine, Attitude, would have been laughed to scorn. That Beckham is plainly completely heterosexual made it seem all the more eccentric to risk the inevitable sneers about being a wuss. He went on to bring his family and babies into the picture, and to be portrayed as a loving father, a New Man and a gentle man. Yet here is someone whose primary audience is football supporters; whose primary stage is that most brutally laddish of institutions, the English football match; and whose intermediaries with the wider world are a hard-bitten and unsentimental cadre: Fleet Street sports reporters.
I’m not suggesting that Beckham sees himself as a one-man mission to civilise sporting culture: he and his wife had self-interested reasons to establish a distinctive brand. But the brand he chose says something to the world — to his world in particular — about his own tolerant instincts and his openness to difference, to experiment, to beauty and to style. It took guts to present this version of himself to his natural supporters. Plenty were ready to say: “We told you so.”
But it succeeded. This tells us something about the changing face of British popular culture which Beckham has done more than reflect: he has helped to symbolise and lead."
mr. parris does not refer to the 'footballer's wives'-like scenes from beckham's personal life, when holding becks up as a role model. but then i happen to think that even famous people deserve to have their private life stay private. ok ok i do read 'people' magazine sometimes, and have a link to entertainment news on my yahoo. i am, however, naive enough to assume that most of those stories are published with the assent of those who feature in them.
meanwhile, a lot of lads have had beckham's positive example before them, and i'd love to think it will make a difference!
"For a footballer to wear a sarong and pink nail varnish took courage
Notebook by Matthew Parris (The Times Online)
IT IS TOO early for the obituaries, but here’s a modest three cheers from a columnist with no interest in football. I have never met David Beckham and don’t expect to, but I admire him. Beyond his footballing, I think he has shown real moral courage as a role model. Anyone who had suggested ten years ago that there would be a natural place in our sporting pantheon for a fellow who wore a sarong, experimented with pink nail varnish and funny hairstyles, sported male jewellery and agreed to an interview with the gay lifestyle magazine, Attitude, would have been laughed to scorn. That Beckham is plainly completely heterosexual made it seem all the more eccentric to risk the inevitable sneers about being a wuss. He went on to bring his family and babies into the picture, and to be portrayed as a loving father, a New Man and a gentle man. Yet here is someone whose primary audience is football supporters; whose primary stage is that most brutally laddish of institutions, the English football match; and whose intermediaries with the wider world are a hard-bitten and unsentimental cadre: Fleet Street sports reporters.
I’m not suggesting that Beckham sees himself as a one-man mission to civilise sporting culture: he and his wife had self-interested reasons to establish a distinctive brand. But the brand he chose says something to the world — to his world in particular — about his own tolerant instincts and his openness to difference, to experiment, to beauty and to style. It took guts to present this version of himself to his natural supporters. Plenty were ready to say: “We told you so.”
But it succeeded. This tells us something about the changing face of British popular culture which Beckham has done more than reflect: he has helped to symbolise and lead."
mr. parris does not refer to the 'footballer's wives'-like scenes from beckham's personal life, when holding becks up as a role model. but then i happen to think that even famous people deserve to have their private life stay private. ok ok i do read 'people' magazine sometimes, and have a link to entertainment news on my yahoo. i am, however, naive enough to assume that most of those stories are published with the assent of those who feature in them.
meanwhile, a lot of lads have had beckham's positive example before them, and i'd love to think it will make a difference!
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