Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Fringe Funnies

Each year a host of one-liners from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival are voted upon and a Top Ten published. This year there appears to be one token funny woman. That sucks. The chosen few are:

10. My mum's so pessimistic, that if there was an Olympics for pessimism ... she wouldn't fancy her chances. (Nish Kumar)

9.  I waited an hour for my starter so I complained: It's not rocket salad. (Lou Sanders)

8.  I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting! (Stewart Francis)

7.  Pornography is often frowned upon, but that's only because I'm concentrating. (George Ryegold)

6.  I took part in the sun tanning Olympics - I just got Bronze. (Tim Vine)

5.  I'm good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet ... I don't know why. (Chris Turner)

4.  You know you're working class when your TV is bigger than your book case (Rob Beckett)

3.  I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister. (Will Marsh)

2.  Last night me and my girlfriend watched 3 DVDs back to back. Luckily I was the one facing the telly. (Tim Vine)

1.  You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks. (Stewart Francis)

My favourite is defo number 5, but then it's the most subtle :-)   . Followed by number 3, for obvious reasons!

btw I presume that the only reason the winning joke works is because so many people know the names of the children. Otherwise, I would offer up Boris Johnson, the Mayor of London.  His children are called:

Lara Lettice
Milo Arthur
Cassia Peaches
Theodore Apollo

Next to these names, I think that

Brooklyn Joseph
Romeo James
Cruz David
Harper Seven

look a bit tame, actually!

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