From One Auntie to Another

Yesterday my beloved Auntie Dorrit z"l would have been 98 years old. She is still part of our lives through the friends we continue to share, the objects in our home that once were hers, and the example she gave of how to be an aunt. This is particularly poignant as I was recently given my first opportunity to be an aunt myself. I hope I will do her proud!

 

It's Albert HaGadol's Birthday Today!

My darling father was born 96 years ago today, as was his beloved brother Charles (also in the pic is their big sister Dorrit and the Friedl hair). My mother used to call him Albertus Magnus, although all he knew of the whereabouts of the Philosopher's Stone was what was written in the Harry Potter books. Since his newborn grandson now shares the name Albert, I thought it fitting to distinguish him thus. Greatly missed and always loved.

Happy Birthday Auntie Dorrit!

Sometimes I get Auntie Dorrit's age wrong. As a woman of a certain age, she didn't like people to know exactly what that was, even going as far as editing her brother's draft of his autobiography to change her date of birth. However old she would have been today, I'm thinking of her, and continue to miss her. In honour of her anniversary, and to stand alongside the other pics of graduation I'm seeing at the moment, here she is in the Vicksburg media of that era!

Dorrit Friedlander's 95th Birthday

11th June marks what would have been the 95th birthday of my beloved Auntie Dorrit z"l. Her memory continues to be a blessing through her loving friends,  a few household items that bring her to mind daily, and the stories we recall. Here is a wild one, recorded in 2012 in Appleton after a meeting in Cody's office:



Much loved and much missed.

Dorrit F Friedlander z"l

Today marks four years since my beloved Auntie Dorrit died.

It is a night I shall never forget - sitting with some of her dearest friends around her bed, telling stories about her adventures. She left the world to the sound of love & laughter, on a cushion of joyous memories.

Of course I miss her dreadfully, but she is still able to let me know her opinion on a variety of subjects!

Someone recently asked me what it meant when we say that someone's memory should be for a blessing. I replied that knowing what our loved one valued in life may inspire us to express and share those same values. Thus our memory of that person is a source for the good deeds that we continue to do.

My aunt was one of the kindest people I have known. All three siblings - Dorrit, Charles and Albert - had kindness in their DNA. This is the blessing I want to share as I remember Professor Dorrit F Friedlander, aleha hashalom.

[NB this was posted on 14th of November London time, not quite the same day yet out west]

Googling Oneself

Head all puffed up with another couple of my 15 minutes this week, after a lovely evening at the premiere of "R Story"followed by a couple of hours of Twitter interest in the event plus a mention in a Guardian blog … and decided to have a look at what my current Google profile reveals:

1.  Woman's Hour (7th November 2014)

Rose Neelam, Vicky Beeching and me being interviewed by Jenni Murray re faith and being gay.

2. Memorial Scrolls Trust (8th February 2014)

Rabbi moment - taking part in the 50th Anniversary service marking the arrival of the Czech Scrolls in London.

3.  It Gets Better (February 2012)

Video for Keshet UK as part of the worldwide project to support LGBT youth.

4. Out 4 Marriage (May 2012)

One of the first videos uploaded by the Out4Marriage campaign supporting what was to become the successful campaign to legalise same-sex marriage in England. Even got a namecheck in the Independent and the Huffington Post :-)

5. Rainbow Jews Oral History (June 2013)

Apparently I'm a wry American - soundbite and transcript of my interview available for you to make up your own mind.

6. Jewish Chronicle interview (September 2009)

JC version of why I became a rabbi.

7. Does Your Rabbi Know You're Here?

Anthony Clavane includes me in the revised introduction to his book.

8. Diva Debate at Homotopia (12th November 2014)
Recording of the debate in Liverpool with Vicky, Rose and Peter Tatchell.

9. Four Four Jew (February 2014)
First appearance as an artefact with items on display as part of the exhibition at the Jewish Museum in Camden as well as being part of the film that ran on a loop in the main room.

10. Memorial Service for Professor Dorrit F Friedlander z"l (June 2014)
Noted as one of the speakers at Lawrence University celebrating the life of my beloved Auntie Dorrit.

That's about it, really. Mainly I'm delighted to see that the unpleasant memories of my unfortunate experience on Long Island have been pushed waaaaaaaaaay way down the list.

Dorrit F Friedlander z"l

Our hearts are full of sadness, but our incredible aunt Dorrit F Friedlander is in pain no more. The obituary that we posted said:

"Dorrit F Friedlander 88, of Appleton passed away at her home on Thursday, November 14, 2013 surrounded by love. She was born in Berlin, Germany on June 11, 1925 to Alex and Sali Friedlander. Dorrit was a beloved aunt, friend and teacher, and sister to Albert z"l and Charles z"l. She is survived by her nieces Rabbi Ariel J Friedlander (Liora) of London, Michal S Friedlander (Daniel) of Berlin and Noam I A Friedlander of Los Angeles; great-niece Orlia Friedlander Ben Hur; sisters-in-law Evelyn Friedlander and Tressie Friedlander; nephew Mark Friedlander and great-nephew Chase Sanderford; cousins: Miriam Baruch and family; Steven Kilston, Vera, Lyra and Rigel; foster cousin Bernard Danzig, and Hermann Balaban.

A funeral will be held on Sunday, November 17, 2013 at 11:00 am at Brettschneider Trettin Nickel Funeral Chapel. Friends may visit the family from 10 am Sunday until the time of service. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Dorrit Friedlander Scholarship Fund at Lawrence University. With gratitude for the wonderful care and support given by dear friends and the staff at Rennes Rehab Center."

Jubilee Ambivalence

Ok it's hot outside and my dna prefers a Siberian climate so I may be a bit grumpy. However, I am not looking forward with any great interest to the upcoming celebratory extra-long weekend of the Queen's Diamond Jubilee. Don't get me wrong - having been part of the jubilation for my Aunt Dorrit last year on the occasion of her 60th year as a teacher at Lawrence University, I am all for the appreciation of the work of a lifetime. I think the Queen has done her job well. I am just wary of the jingoism such an event engenders. And I don't get the concept of a ruler by birth. So I shall enjoy the extra holiday. I will watch some of the pageantry on TV. And I shall try not to eat too much!